When Harri Went Missing by Sheri LeClair Banitt

I’ve taken a long hiatus from the blog, because I have struggled with the many changes Covid 19 has brought to the world and to my life. Now, the loss of my dear cat, Harri, has pulled me out of my apathy to tell her story.

I have been feeding a local cat colony for many years. Each spring the mommas have kittens. We catch the kittens and find them homes before the mommas carry them off to the wild. Three years ago, a little orange kitten was caught. We fell in love with him right away. He was a rascally ginger, and we named him Harry after another rascally ginger across the pond. He fit into our family with ease, managing to capture the hearts of my husband and I, along with our other cats and dogs. He became our house cat extraordinaire and chief entertainer.

When Harry was old enough, we took him to the vet for his neutering surgery. They called me before the procedure to inform me that Harry was not a male cat, he was a female. She already loved her name, so we kept it. And that is how Harry became Harri.

For three years Harri snuggled, loved, and entertained us. From the beginning of the Covid 19 pandemic quarantine and working from home, she was always in my lap or very close by. She helped me cope with the changes and stresses surrounding the pandemic including the isolation and sometimes boredom of spending my days home alone.

On Christmas Eve 2021, we were excited to have our family over to celebrate as we had missed so many holiday celebrations in 2020. In the excitement and activity of fifteen guests and dinner on the stove, somehow Harri went missing. Our cats are fed by our back door and they often hang out there at mealtime. We think an unsuspecting guest opened the door for a breath of fresh air and she slipped out.

I was not aware that Harri was missing until late in the day and looking back to the last time we had seen her, six or seven hours had gone by. It is very bad for a housecat with no outdoor skills and no acclimation to the weather to be out on a winter day in Minnesota. We looked for her and called but there was no trace of her. The next days were cold, windy, snowy, and below zero. It is hard to imagine she could survive. Nonetheless, I posted her missing information on all the local sites I could think of.

It is now thirty days later and Harri has not been found. I miss her greatly each day. And I have learned, again, that I am not in control. Some things just happen because we don’t expect or prepare for them. Cats will run out the door without considering the consequences. A hostess in the middle of a gathering does not have the cat whereabouts on the top of mind. Cats are animals, and Harri did have a full belly, long fur coat and claws intact when she slipped outside. There is a chance she found a warm place to hunker down or perhaps a kindly person took her in.

People have reacted to my search for Harri with compassion and kindness that I have not experienced in a long time. Folks who might disagree on politics and public health policy are uniting with me to search for Harri. So many are praying for her safe return to me and looking for her with me. There have been four false alarms. Either the cat was spotted and not captured, or the captured cat was a male and not Harri.

I know there is much suffering in the world and many human tragedies that put a missing cat into a different perspective. I don’t know if Harri will ever come home. I hope she does as I truly miss her companionship. If she doesn’t, I will be sad and regretful that I was not more attentive to her on that day. I will also remember how my loss inspired many covid weary and politically suspicious people to put aside their differences and personal hardships to help a heartbroken woman search for her beloved pet. This is humanity.

Gardening by Sheri LeClair Banitt

I often say that I love indoor and outdoor gardening. I have come to fully realize that is a bit of a stretch. I love indoor gardening. I love to buy cute pots and exotic plants. I will water and fertilize and give them light until they bloom or bear fruit. I will propagate cuttings, repot and transplant all manner of indoor plants. My enthusiasm has no bounds and you can find lovely bits of nature in every room of my home.

Indoor greenery makes me happy.

And then there is the outdoor gardening. I love planning the gardens. I love buying the plants and flowers for the gardens. I love the little decorative things. I love the birdhouses and birdbaths and birdfeeders. I love the trellises and hanging planters. I love the raised vegetable gardens and patio pots filled with herbs.

And then it rains, and everything grows and then come the WEEDS. They typically arrive just before a holiday and when company is coming. The first WEED BONANZA is just before Memorial Day. I want the spring gardens to look good, so I need to clear the brown stuff from last fall and the straw cover from winter. It takes time and effort and sometimes it is cold and rainy. I don’t love this.

Spring flowers.

The second WEED EXTRAVAGANZA typically arrives just as it gets over 90 degrees and the humidity is 80%; just before the 4th of July as the corn is knee high. The bugs are hungry and every thing in the garden scratches bare legs and arms as you try to manage the heat. You have to carefully navigate around blossoms yet to open so you don’t break off the lilies you have been waiting for all year. I don’t love this.

Summer blooms.

The final WEED COMPETITION comes as the winds of fall arrive to mark Labor Day. This will be a sad and tired kind of a battle. Harvest is over. You still have a month or more of color before the snow flies. But, you have to pull THE WEEDS. I don’t love this.

Last harvest of the season.

Did I mention mowing the lawn and trimming the bushes and picking the beans, and dead heading the petunias and watering everything? I don’t love this.

And yet, I love the flowers and the pretty colors. So, I guess I love indoor gardening and I DO outdoor gardening so I can love the gardens.

Waste Not, Want Not, and Other Summer Wisdom by Sheri LeClair Banitt

So hot you can cook an egg on the sidewalk, but no one wants to because it’s too hot to go outside. This is day #8 with a temperature over 90 degrees in Minnesota. Most of those days were on the excessive heat warning advisory because of high temperatures and high humidity. Tonight at 6 pm, the temp is 96 with a ‘feels like’ 99. That’s pretty hot and it looks like we will not go below 90 for another ten days or so.

Two weeks ago I was covering my outdoor plants because of a frost warning and now we are sweltering in weather that we usually don’t see until July and August. Uff-da!

I am still working from home due to the pandemic and have an opportunity to impact my environment during this heat wave. I am aware of the extra energy needed to keep homes and businesses cool, so I want to do my part to limit unnecessary electricity usage. I have closed the blinds and pulled the curtains. This helps keep it cool and gives my air conditioner a break. It’s a little odd sitting in the dark and working, but then nothing has been normal throughout this pandemic, so I can roll with it.

It is hot and humid and we are in a drought. I can see my lawn turning brown. The flowers and plants are wilting. The river level is low. I am very aware of how fortunate I am to have a safe water supply at my fingertips in several rooms in my home. I don’t want to waste it so I am limiting laundry, washing dishes and bathing. We are doing what is necessary, but only washing full loads, and no bubble baths. I am watering the plants outside from the rain barrels around the house.

One of the things I have appreciated while working from home and socially distancing through the pandemic is that I have used my car very little. As a commuter, I normally add 30,000 miles each year to the odometer. This year I added about 5,000. That is less fuel used and less polution created.

I have done less shopping, bought fewer things and taken a closer look at the items in and around my home. I have made do with what I have and kept myself occupied with books, hobbies and crafts. I have spent much more time outdoors enjoying the nature around me.

So, on this hot day, I walked the dog and listened to the river and the birds and the kids playing outside. I sweated and complained and was able to commiserate with other walkers passing by. I made lemonade with fresh, clear, cold water from the tap in my comfortable, air conditioned home. I was able to work and earn a living while enjoying all of these things.

I am very fortunate to live in a wealthy country and to have a middle class lifestyle. I never want to take this for granted. I want to live joyfully and thankfully. This means I need to preserve and protect the natural resources around me so they can be shared with generations to follow.

Reduce. Reuse. Recycle. Everywhere. All the time.

Summer Wedding 40 Years Ago by Sheri LeClair Banitt

40 years ago on June 6th, there was a wedding in Cannon Falls. Two kids, too young to be married and too young to know it. In our rural Minnesota town, it was fairly common, especially if there were no plans for college.

I thought my dress was unique, the tuxes one of a kind. Looking back, I see that almost every wedding in 1980-1985 looked the same. Pretty nonetheless.

Here’s me, all 117 pounds of me. I was heavier than all my friends and really wished I had lost weight for the wedding. These days, women are learning to love their bodies, no matter the size.

Still married after 40 years. What is the secret to staying married? Commitment, tolerance, kindness, love. Love is an action, not a feeling. If you’re not doing something, no one is feeling anything. If you want to stay married, stay married. Don’t give up, just do love.

Coping in 2021 by Sheri LeClair Banitt

On February 7, 2020 I started The Millennial Boomer blog with optimism and glee. I was not ready, but I started anyway. I always wanted to blog and I had the free time to do it. The blog was going to highlight my experiences as a Boomer in the workplace with all the Millennials. I love my job and the people I work with and it seemed like others could relate to my world. But I wasn’t quite sure how to use Word Press or how the blog would turn out.

I had a few fun entries about the stuff I do and think about. It was fun and light hearted. And then Covid came. My employer sent me and my work team home along with over 2,000 fellow associates to keep us safe from the virus. This was a good decision and has protected us from illness and death. But it caused extra work and extra stress. Navigating the changes made it harder to get the blogging done. But I got in a rhythm and posted about my hobbies and the fun things I was doing while quarantined at home.

And then came the murder of George Floyd. This shook me deeply and changed my perspective on many things. Because I was working from home, I was more in touch with social media and saw the video on Facebook as it was happening. I was horrified to see the incident and had to stop working for the day to process all of it. I tried to move on with the blog but started to feel that I needed to make changes.

Around this time, my daughter, who follows Dr. Stacey Patton on twitter heard about a free class she was offering to help people learn how to use Word Press. I signed up for the class and was accepted. I was so excited to learn about digital media from an expert at a time when I needed guidance.

The class was fun and informative and I was surrounded by people like me who needed help navigating the digital media world. I created many fun projects that are posted on the blog. But the most valuable take away was getting to know my classmates, who were mostly people of color. I got a whole new perspective on what it means to be in America when you are white.

I learned about racial inequality in America. I started to understand things that affect me daily that I never even thought about. I learned about white privilege and how I have it, whether I know it or not. I learned how ignorance is embedded in white supremacy and how I unknowingly support it.

And once you know a thing, you cannot unknow it. That is when everything became very hard for me and the joy of blogging disappeared. I felt the weight of the pandemic and the heavier weight that the murder of George Floyd brought to public awareness.

Then came the Presidential election and the contentious discourse in the media. It was impossible to coast in safety on the sidelines. The two political parties were so opposite that you could not avoid taking a stand. I took the side of love, compassion, kindness, tolerance and charity. This made me a target for many Trump loving Republicans who see these ideologies as weaknesses instead of virtues. Many hours of conversation with friends and family, online and in person revealed thoughts, feelings and values that had been previously hidden.

When Biden/Harris won the election, there was no peace. Many Trump supporters backed his assertion that the election was stolen from him. Their anger soon brought us to the insurrection at the Capitol in January. Then came more tension, more polarity, more reasons to leave friendships and distance from family when there is no way to bridge the chasm.

With all the social unrest, I still had to manage the increased workload and challenging new processes that Covid 19 brought to the workplace.

So, the blog moved down in my priorities. I also worried about what to publish. I wondered if it was right to talk about funny, silly, frivolous things when real life was demanding such deep introspection.

After taking a break from the blog for a bit, here’s what I decided:

Life goes on during good times and bad times.

I have white privilege.

Talking about disagreements is how we gain understanding. Understanding is the first step in making changes.

Blogging is fun. I can support changes to eliminate systemic racism and this does not eliminate my right to happiness and my ability to experience and share joy.

Hope you’ll join me in my continued blogging journey.

Peace.

HR Regulations Have Improved the Work Application Process by Sheri LeClair Banitt

I work for a financial services company, supervising a customer operations team. I hire for entry level, customer service positions and frequently get first time job seekers who are straight out of college, and displaced older workers, looking for a fresh start.

I have two specialists on my team who interview with me. We have a standard set of questions designed to help us find people who will be able to do the work in our area. Our job is to find qualified, capable individuals and then give them the tools they need to succeed.

Looking through the box of ‘Old Papers From the Office’ that my grandfather had saved gave me a new perspective on why we do what we do today. He is no longer living, but I knew my grandpa to be a fair, honest, caring person. His job was important to him and I recall that he was a lifelong learner and continued to find new practices that helped the workers he represented. Watch to see how far we have advanced in privacy practices since his day.

New Me 2021 by Sheri LeClair Banitt

No make up, no glasses, just me in the winter.

The River Walk has been a repeating theme on my blog.  This is because I have been working from home since March 2020 due to the covid 19 pandemic.  I have replaced the 45-minute commute to and from work with two walks along the river instead.

The Little Cannon River Falls 12-26-2020

I’m thankful to be working from home. Even so, it’s not easy. I lead a large customer service team with a fast-paced workload and a changing daily volume of work.  In order to be successful as a team, I need to be successful as a leader. This takes extra care when working remotely. I have to understand what everyone is doing, how they’re feeling about it and make sure that everything is getting done.  The emotional work is harder when you can’t see each other in person, face to face.

I love my job and I’m good at it. I think it’s because I’ve spent a lifetime caring for and about other people. My greatest talent is generating enthusiasm and cultivating pride of accomplishment.  I lead from behind, and most people don’t even realize my input.  It’s my calling, it’s what I do, I can’t not do this.  I love having my team in the spotlight, I love seeing them succeed. And I hate being in the spotlight, though I do want to succeed.  It is the fear of judgement that keeps me in the shadows.

I’ve spent my life striving for more; always wanting to do better and be better.  I have compared myself to everyone I meet and always find myself wanting.  I’m not as smart, not as educated, don’t work for any worthy cause, haven’t suffered enough, haven’t overcome enough, don’t have as much money, not as thin, not as good-looking, don’t have as many friends. These are the thoughts that propel me to work harder, study more, do more, be more.  It’s like walking uphill and never reaching the top.

I’ve done many things, but never achieved the expert status I’ve been looking for.  There is always someone doing it better. There is always another book, another talk show, another podcast with all the secrets to being best.

The new pace of the pandemic has given me time to slow down and reflect. Looking back, I realize that while striving for something else, I have missed many wonderful things within my reach, like the River Walk. 

This path has been just outside my door for 27 years and I’ve never appreciated it.  People travel from miles away to walk the trails that pass by the meeting of the Big Cannon and the Little Cannon rivers.  There is nature and wildlife for miles within steps from my home. Since March, I have discovered the seasons in ways I haven’t seen since childhood.  I have been out walking in sunshine and rain, heat and cold, humidity and dry winds.  I have seen birds and fish and dogs with their people out enjoying the world without words, without conversation, without judgement. It’s given me time to think about the people and places I have taken for granted and never really appreciated. I wish I could go back in time and do some things over.  I would do them better, that’s for sure.

And now the world is changing.  As the airlines and internet have brought us closer, the human condition has pushed us apart.  We are mortal and subject to disease, illness and death.   For most of us, the reality of this pandemic is the first time we’ve had to face our fragility.  In order to keep others safe, we’ve had to give up some freedom.  We’re staying home, keeping apart, wearing masks to avoid sharing our breath, and thereby our germs with each other. We’re not used to depending on ourselves for schooling, food, entertainment, and worship.  In these most trying times, it is clear that we need each other to survive, even with opposing political views, lifestyles and ideology. The sudden change of routines has left many feeling isolated and vulnerable.  Some have fallen to despair and depression.

While I have moments of both, I choose to re-imagine…me.  What if I am complete?  What if I am enough? What if I stop striving and start living? This thinking has energized me in a way nothing else has. I am giving myself permission to be me.  I am going to do the things I want to do in the way I want to do them.  I don’t have to consult the experts – I am the expert. If you can do something better than me, good for you.  I will cheer you on and applaud your success; that is my calling and it gives me joy.

 But for me, I am going to enjoy myself without words, without conversation, without judgement. I am going to be me in the way only I can.  I am going to walk the seasons with the river. There will be sunshine and rain, heat and cold, humidity and dry winds. I will take my place in humanity without apology or arrogance. And it will be enough. And I will let it be.

My White Privilege by Sheri LeClair Banitt

I am reluctant to talk about the ways I experienced 2020. There were so many bad things happening. Covid 19 brought so many changes and challenges. We had a contentious election with a President who brought out the worst in everyone.

And then George Floyd was murdered in broad daylight, on the street, with a crowd watching. This rocked my world. I usually don’t talk about it because I am white and I have not suffered the injustice of racism. I don’t want to trivialize the plight of the oppressed with complaints of my feelings. But if I am going to make a difference, I need to speak.